“Oil” and “Butter” for Men


A man needs to both sense and know that he is valued and can provide for a woman.  It is what he values the most.  Both of these are communicated through some type of connection.

In order for a man to even consider getting to know a woman, he has to have a sense that he has at least a shot that his advances could produce a win.   The win is not just at making at successful connection.  No.  The win is, at first, finding a woman who he thinks could value, respect and appreciate who and what he is.  A woman’s response to his approach produces either a risk or a reward for him.  Whether he was falsely judged due to lack of clarity or empowered to advance further, plays a huge part in what he’ll do next.

When a man finds that he is accepted by a woman, what he does next is want to provide something for her.  Accepting his advance is like oil to a man.  It provides the lubricant for things to go smoothly.  It allows him to more easily slide into his next step.

Knowing that he is valued is like butter to a man.  It gives him a satisfying feeling and a lovely taste of what is yet to come.  Now, he’ll decide to start spending his time, energy and resources on someone who he believes will accept what he has to offer.  He’ll want to provide even more.

In order for him to sense and know that a woman will accept his advances, a connection has to first be made.

You’ll hear more on connection on the next episode of Conscious Coaching, Tip #6  Connection, Connection, Connection

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